Miss Kolka

producing her own life

More than a mother | 11 janvier 2009

So this has been a hectic week...

Gave birth to a baby, got back to work 5 days later, had a few meetings and have never looked better in my stilletos.
No - not really, Im not Rachida Dati (France's Justice minister) and I am SO not back to work.

When I heard about and saw on the news Dati's return to the political scene only 5 DAYS after giving birth to a baby girl by caesarean,I must say I wasn't just shocked, I was horrified. There she was, little miss sexy in her dark suit and high heels, smiling to the cameras, showing that she surely did not need to bond with her baby or spend some time with it. Her job was more important. A personal choice some might say. I think it's more like a reflexion of how motherhood is seen in France and where women stand in the french workplace. The discussion following this highly mediatized and sometimes praised return proves it.

Having had my own baby the day before, and stayed at the hospital 5 days I can very well put my self into her shoes. I have always worked my arse of and be dedicated to most of the jobs I've done. Before being pregnant I practically lived for France 24 and gave it all I got. But in my mind - I always knew how important family and children were to me and that I was ready to make sacrifices when the time came - mind you perhaps a bit earlier than planned but I was still ready for it.
Having had spent one half hour away from my own little Mr. F since his birth, I know that I never would have been able to do what missus Dati did. Call it cowerdness if you like, I call it responsability. If you decide to have a child, its not like buying a new bike, it takes time and effort (believe me I know) to feed it, show it the love it deserves, taking care of all its little needs and just be there for the first hard days in its existence. Its not easy to be trown into the daylight after having spent 9 months in the safest place there is. A babysitter can not substitute for motherly (or be it fatherly) warmth.

Im also horrified because it actually confirms what I have been observing in my work environment and the French society as a whole for the last 3 years. Women and men are not equals. Women seem to have to prove themselves all the time, seduce men even and the market is not made for a balance between family life and career. This case proves it once more. What kind of example is it to French women (or employeurs) that a high profile minister doesn't feel comfortable to take her own maternity leave?(which has to be said is no god's gift in France, only 8 weeks for women and 14 days for men! Compared to the 6- 12 months in scandinavia) That she is ready to sacrifice the first few crucial days with her child to seduce the media and prove to her chauvanistic boss that she is one of the "gang" and she doesn't need special treatment, is that in some way bravery? I dont think so, I just think its sad, but then again I only judge from my perspective.

A mother and a minister? I dont think so. A minister perhaps, but the act of giving birth to a child does not make you necessarily a mother.

Publié par Kolka à 10:58:16 dans Miss Kolka | Commentaires (1) | Permaliens